Think no more!

That moment when you finally decide to give up on your 'neurotic' act because it is literally driving you crazy.
And, finally after you come out of your delusional state, you see how badly your absence, ignorance rather, has affected the real people around you.
Good luck dealing with the awful feeling of not being there when they truly needed you!
 
"When words fail, music prevails."

Above & Beyond (Now I know why everyone was going crazy about them)

Katy Perry - Roar

Counting Stars - One Republic

Lana Del Rey (I love her almost as much as Adele)

Hardwell vs Goyte featuring Kimbra - Spaceman (The best mix ever)  

Bad Romance- Lady Gaga (Some songs can never go out of style)

O Womaniya 

I feel that I have newly started deciphering that yes we have all grown up. Now, when people around me are either getting married or are contemplating marriage. This new knowledge has brought along a lot of inhibitions and insecurities about the future.

Note to self:

• Take it easy sometimes, okay?
• Stop taking everything (including yourself) so seriously!
• There's never a need to thoroughly analyze the actions of other people or yourself. Well, not unless you actually join the CBI! 
• Come out of your sick and stupid dream-bubble. Now.    

Lastly,

I am glad that Winter is finally showing up! 

Clearing the clutter

When we do things that we shouldn't have despite of having knowledge of what the outcome of doing them would be.
When we say things that we shouldn't have because some secrets should be locked in that little box in your heart and never to be said out loud.
When you cannot forgive yourself for doing it all, saying it all.
When you cannot stop admonishing yourself for being the fool.
Take a moment, reminisce it all again and then say to yourself, 'Yes I made more mistakes, yes I know it was a big deal and I've been extremely faulty but now instead of thinking about it as a chapter of shame and regret, I shall think of it as a lesson well learnt!'

Sigh...

Rather than trying so hard to be a part of a group, you should try to be yourself because only that makes sense.
Then again 'Be yourself' gives rise to 'Who am I' and 'How do I be myself'...
To know this, we are breathing. I hope, I will be enlightened of it someday.

one by two

Office.
Sometimes its just us, we over-think. The other person is not always the bad guy.

People are not that difficult to deal with, we make ourselves believe that they are. I know, I too have umpteen times said that its not a cinch being around people rather being happy around them but eventually I always realize it never was a big deal.

Another thing that got me thinking was, whether to say it out or not?
For say, when having a conversation with a bunch of people, you have so many things in head that you can say but you choose to stay mum. How does it matter if you speak your heart?
Now, there are countless reasons why you don't say it but for how long will this continue?
There will be a time when you'll stop not talking, when you'll start being yourself. So why not do it right away!

I think I shouldn't have done it, that thing. But now, it's all said and done so rather than fretting about it, I should do something constructive.

Home.
Feel, speak, enjoy, love, live, cry, suffer, make mistakes, be outrageous, apologize, learn, discover yourself!
Now is what we have. Who knows world might really end on 21/12/12!!
Haha...
What if it actually does?

When you wonder about death, you realize who are the ones that truly matter to you and you would wish to spend more time with them before everything is over.
If believing in 21/12/12 helps you express your love to your loved ones, then you are not as stupid as people would think!

I love Mumbai. People here can be as sweet as bitter they are! Confusing naa?? That's how we are.

Adele-Skyfall. Love it like crazy!

P.S.: I wrote half the post at work but then I got busy so I saved it as a draft and now added more and posted, hence the title!

I'm just so sad...

I'm just so sad...

Why don't I get to do what I want to?
Why? Why?

Again,
even this is my fault!

Sometimes I feel it's better to be immature and self-centered, at least then you won't think about how the other person would be feeling and why they choose to behave like this and that they are completely wrong, whatever be the circumstances!!
I just somehow, in my head, figure out a way to not blame the other person for whatever he/she has done and then end up being angry at myself!

Aaarrrghh... I just can't concentrate on studies with all this running around me!!
*sigh*
Bah... I'll figure out a way (hopefully). After all, how many excuses am I gonna make?!

Anyway,
the truth is, if I would've done the right things at the right time, MAYBE none of this would be happening right now!

I wish...
Why do we wish so much!

In the hole...

I am so annoyed at the moment!
No, I don't have a reason or maybe I do but it's not good enough!

It just vexes me that I can't be there! Ugh... this sucks. Big time.

And, people may blabber that they are here to support you... but truly that's just another statement!
You have to support yourself and that's only fair!!

Aarghh!!

You know, sometimes you just want certain people to understand that they are needed during certain times without having to say it to them explicitly, you want them to be with you or at least call you for that matter...  And it just perturbs you even more when they don't get it, when they fail to be there with you during those certain times...
But
None of them have been blessed with any kinda super powers that they would just come to know about your state of mind!
Moreover, there are good odds that they might be having a bad day themself and would be waiting for you to come and soothe them...
You know, you should never ignore the other side of the coin, not even in your worst days!

'The sweet escape' by Gwen Stefani, is what I'm listening to right now...
It reminds me of my sweet junior college days, when I didn't have a Smartphone (which means no music) and I used to be glued on to VH1 all day and this song used to be played on every hour! The first time I heard it, I hated it but then after watching it on TV so many times I ended up falling in love with it... it's still one of my best 'pep-up' songs!

I truly believe by going through a person's playlist, you can pretty much figure them out because music is the best way to express yourself (even listening to music is)...
But again, sometimes you hear some songs just for fun and not for what they mean... and that's why I conspicuously mentioned 'pretty much'.

It makes me so sad that I couldn't save me from falling again...

I wish... Why do we wish so much!